I apologize for the lack of updates.....as my good friend Ali was so kind as to point out this morning, going so far as to say my life is boring.
Anyways.... in today's dream (parts of which are lost to the last two hours):
My cousin is Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana. We are at my grandparents house, and See You Again is blaring. I'm not at all shocked that she's my cousin, just that she happens to come from the conservative side of my family. But I'm waiting near the massive train sculpture thing that my grandpa has, and I will someday own, and then we head to a party, because it's the thing to do, obviously. Internet message poster ATLIllini has notified me that fellow IMP KDL05 will be attending this party, with an interesting guest, who turns out to be a Rockford radio personality, Jenna. We go to this party, Miley/Hannah and I, and that's when I realize it's actually a law party, and there's my ex. So, we stay on opposite sides of the room, I dance to Miley's performance, and then suddenly, everybody else runs out of the room, and I'm stuck there needing to go to the bathroom, knowing that she is in the only bathroom, and I'll have to run in to her when she comes out. That's when Bonita woke me up. Thank you Bonita.
Both of these dreams happened this afternoon, one during a snooze:
#5- (Ironically, this morning, we were talking on the air about celebrity cameos): I am walking around the Bielfeldt Athletic Administration Building on campus, and see some people hanging out in a conference room (that isn't actually there in real life), and there's Illinois golf coach Mike Small. We talk for 10 minutes about how his team won a tournament this weekend, and how it was the best win his team has had in school history. I ask him if he had to TIVO the Ryder Cup, and he said yes, and I then make this joke: "My gosh, you must have had more shots on your brain than an alcoholic!" which, for some reason, makes both of us laugh so hard, that we hug. Mike gets called over to do a TV interview, so I prepare to leave, except both of the men's and women's cross country teams are preparing to take their team picture, so I can't get out of the entryway. That's when I wake up, and then go back to sleep to have DREAM #6, a very quick dream
#6- Kevin, from the morning show, is lamenting how he hasn't had any of his favorite candy, Schillpees, since forever, because his kids end up taking his, and this morning, he found some tucked in his car somewhere, completely melted. He told me this, and immediately, I knew what they tasted like, (M&Ms), and where I could find them. So I run out to my car, and sure enough, tucked away in the curtains of my blinders (yes, like the blinders that protect your eyes from the sun.....mine are curtains), is a half eaten bag of Schillpees. I bring them in, and put them in the freezer for instant freezing, and then give them to Kevin frozen, but delicious. But I'm feeling guilty, because I don't know exactly how old they are, so I tell him that they could be two years old, and then he begins to yell......and I wake up.
More on my weekend in Rock Island soon, hopefully.
I am back in college, which is in a large metropolitan area. I'm walking with Glenn to my math class, which I'm dreading immensely, because I haven't taken a math class since calculus in high school. So I get there, and LPGA golfer Lorena Ochoa is teaching the class, and is apparently a math wiz, and also a whack job about her math. I pull up a chair next to Emily Wickstrom, who works in the University of Illinois Sports Information Department. (How do I say this....Emily is awesome in real life, but I wouldn't say she gives off the impression that she's some sort of amazing math wiz) Emily and I lament that Lorena is being so tough about this class, and apparently, there is a math tournament coming up tomorrow for the math majors. But for whatever reason, Lorena is calling on Emily to answer the first few math problems in class, to make an example of her. But Emily knows them! Without even figuring them out! Ochoa can't finish writing the problem, and Emily spits out the answers. The Professor is asking her for her reasoning (which, for some reason, I'm able to logically answer how each of the problems is solved, but I dont answer out loud, for fear of ruining Emily's moment), and Emily can't answer that.....and then the alarm went off.
Greetings from some fake lodge in Rock Island. It's bizarre.
Already getting a little fuzzy after 5 minutes, and I only have two minutes so no in depth reports, but the girl from dream update #1 was there again, and we were in some type of class at the National Hurricane Center, which I knew because it was three black buildings that were black, with red centers, much like the hurricane flag, which is the inverse.
Anyway, she and I (and yes, it does concern me a little bit that the same girl is in two dreams in a few days) were instead reminiscing about high school, and it turns out she played soccer, which is awesome, because I did too (I didn't) so we played while walking from the bus in to the classroom.
OK, so as most of my close friends know, I have the most bizarre dreams. There are days when I feel like I'm just on LSD, and weird, weird things happen. I always say that I'm going to chronicle these dreams when they happen, but really hadn't figured out how to do it. So, it starts here, today.
Dream from this morning, between 2-3, which I only know because my phone was acting up, and woke me up twice, which wasn't cool.
I was out to dinner with a female friend who I haven't seen in weeks, at best, in real life. We went out, and she exclaimed that we HAD to go to the bathroom right now. The bathrooms in this restaurant were two stalls, which were in the dining room. While in the bathroom, she told me how she had always loved me, and just had to tell me right now. Mind you, I was sitting on the toilet, because that's all they had in the men's room, was a toilet. So, we discussed, everyone was happy, and then exited the bathroom, for a lack of space. Upon coming out of the bathroom, a 50 year old woman was there waiting for us with a pregnancy test, to which I responded, no, not right now, thank you.
For the next five to ten minutes of the dream, the girl and I argued about how and when we should change our status on facebook. That's right, friends.....even in my dreams, I get no sex. Instead, a discussion about how we should post something on facebook.
Following that discussion (I said we should give it a week or so before we post it, and that was the eventual concensus), there was tennis viewing on a gigantic screen in the park, so we went and watched that.
Back tonight from the Daschler wedding of Leigh and Louis. Amazing ceremony, and I'll get some pictures on here tomorrow, hopefully. But I have some things that I think I need to just get out today.
My friend Brittany asked me on Thursday or Friday whether or not I was going to cry at the wedding. I said no, that I don't cry at weddings. I don't. On the day of, I'm a bundle of energy, and filled with happiness for my friends, and the experience of it.
The day after, I'm a mess.
This one was especially hard today. And it's hard to explain.
I'm blessed with amazing friends, I truly am. I'm lucky to have the people around me that I have around me. I couldn't begin to list the number of people I think I could call at any second should I have a problem, and needed something. That's true to this day, and I consider myself quite fortunate.
Last night was one of those nights to celebrate, and we did. Leigh and Louis were amazing throughout. As I said to Leigh in the card, she's the person I emulate in all things. She is flawed, but never faltering. She brings joy to everyone who knows her. She takes negatives, and is able to somehow force the smile on her face that everyone expects, and within an hour, it's gone from forced, to natural. She is the person I hope to be on a daily basis.
Louis is an unbelievable guy. To deal with Leigh is not an easy task, but he does it with his own sense of style and comedy. He is strong, but not overbearing. He is a sarcastic teaser, and yet shows the sweetest sensitivity at the most crucial moments.
And to be a part of a wedding to celebrate the two of them was an honor.
The party was fantastic. What added the extra level was Kalleen being able to attend. She's a rock for me too. I'm always amazed at her ability to switch between the greatest gossip queen on the east coast, to the caring and understanding friend. On some crucial issues, we have philosophical differences, but I don't think there are very many more people who I would trust to give me the perfect advice at any given moment. And for her to make the trip up from North Carolina, and sacrifice a day without Luke....(and Tom)....
So yeah. Yesterday, was amazing. Those three, along with Glenn. And my new friend Jeremy, who truly is the Des Moines Mike Cation, and I'm proud to say I'm the Champaign version of him. And Keri, the first lawyer I've actually been able to talk to in four years without feeling a bit of vitriole, who Leigh promises would be my BFF if we actually had the time or proximity to each other. And Brooke, the matron of honor who puts ants in my shirts. And Sarah, who did shots, to my surprise.
Kalleen and I talked long in to the night, after hours and hours of dancing, and dominating at name that tune. And I went to bed with a smile on my face.
It's not there today.
It's not that any of that has changed. I didn't rue the drive back, and had good company as always. I don't come back to a bad situation at all. It's good. I have a job that, for the most part, I enjoy. I love my apartment, I love my cats, I'm able to run again after my stress fracture, and my friends are always there. And although I am absent the money that I think anyone would enjoy, I do not want. I do not have any pressing needs that impair my life.
But today, I long for my friends that are not able to be with me on a daily basis.
Today, I cry because I wish I had that opportunity to go for a walk with Leigh, which is supposed to be for us to get in better shape, but always ended at Custard Cup. I cry because Kalleen won't be there in the morning to stop by my office and gossip about people down the hall. I cry because Ted is in Jamaica, and no matter how much I wish I could be there and support him in these massive endeavors that I can't begin to place myself in, I can't do it enough to satisfy myself. I cry because Ali is stuck in Australia, and I can't afford thousands of dollars to go and see her, and every time she is here, it's entirely too short, and can't ever be enough to match the level of love and caring I have for her. I cry because Bri is in this unknown town to me, and every time I talk to her, she tells me how much she misses being here, and I can't ever offer enough words to say that I miss that more than she does. And I could list a hundred more. I miss my intern. Hell, I miss Jeremy, and cry because I wish I had had the opportunity to meet him before this weekend. I miss Keri, and cry because I trust enough in Leigh to tell me that she's the kind of person who I truly would be extremely close with. And yeah, I miss a hell of a lot more of you that I'm not naming, and today, I cry because I can't be with all of you.
So today, I long for my friends. I will allow this for myself for the night. I will sit here with my candles lit, and my Imogen Heap and my Miles Davis, and let every possible tear hit the floor, until there are no more. And I will have that drink, remembering in my head every moment that will flicker through my already completely oversaturated brain, filled to the brim.
And tomorrow, I will restart, refreshed.
Tomorrow, I will smile, thinking of Leigh, and Louis, and their honeymoon, and chuckle thinking about the amount of immodium she'll have with her. And I will smile while thinking about Kalleen's reunion with her son, knowing that it's a joy that she cannot express to me, but will be able to prepare me for when it is my turn. And I'll smile thinking of Ted, smoking some incredible Jamaican weed, listening to music never heard before in the states, but will mean more to Ted than it could to anyone else. And I'll smile thinking of Ali, and how even on her days when she wishes she was in the states, she can solve it with a walk on the beach. And I'll smile thinking of Bri, and how much dancing and singing experiences I'll want to share the next time I'm there. And I'll smile while missing my intern. And I'll smile while realizing there's a Des Moines me. And I'll smile at having another really fun person to visit when I get to go to Portland again, which needs to be sooner than later, so that I can collect my dollar.
And I'll smile because I know that no matter how many tears there are on a day like this, there are infinite reasons to wipe all of them away. And so to my friends, both extremely old, and extremely new, I say I love you all very much. I may not get to express it in the ways that I want, but believe me, it's always there, and always will be, and I consider myself lucky to have all of you in my life.
First of all, my love to Miss Britney Spears, and most importantly, congratulations to her for getting her life back together a little bit. She looked awesome at the VMAs. Although, I found it really weird that she held the microphone in front of her face while talking, and you couldn't see her face at all.
The weekend was a busy one. Got to see my brothers, who had a very unexpected visit to my house, and got to stay here, which I had no idea about. But I think they ended up having a good time, even though they trashed my bedroom, and somehow, Steve, you made my couch smell. I don't know how that happened, but you did it, kiddo.
Memorial Stadium looked awesome. The press box will be great. The singular problem that I had with it was that for the first hour or so, for 11AM games, the front row of the press box is basically overheated because the sun shines through the massive glass window panes. But good night, I was really impressed with how nice it all looks. The suites are going to be a big fundraiser for the athletic department. The stands look pretty full, even though it wasn't a sellout. And how about the tailgating. I was thrilled to tailgate again, and had 5 to visit. Shout outs to the TCIs, Dawn, Amber/Matt/Brad, Ted, and of course, the Crackmonkeys, for their hospitality.
This week is Leigh's wedding. It's going to be a full weekend for me. I have decided on a gift, which I obviously can't list here, but I think it's going to be an incredible weekend. I'm looking forward to meeting Leigh's friends, and going from there. Especially since Leigh has talked some up in particular.
Last week, I put together a pretty kick ass warmup Mix for the Illini soccer team (winners, btw, of the inaugural Illini Challenge Cup). Not necessarily because I like the music (girls, we need to get rid of R Kelly at this point....), but because of the challenges involved. Here are the rules: No swearing No references to alcohol drinking No references to drugs No edited swear words No slurs
Now, this is not easy, when half of the songs contain many of those things. And by many, I mean many. So we would take out entire verses. We'd take out choruses if need be. And as a result, it was completely clean, with some Busta Rhymes, some Fort Minor, and yes, some Lil Wayne. So, now it's time for a bigger challenge: The football team. I've got an clean slate. I can add whatever I would like. So, I've got some Tribe in there....a little Talib Kwali. Little things that I like. But I'm also trying to throw in some Nas. And some Lil Wayne. And hopefully, we can get it done, and get it approved. That's going to be the trick. There's not as much concern about the soccer warmup CD, just because you don't have 30,000 people listening to it. But at football, you do, and many of those people who come in early are above the age of 60, and they feel completely ok with complaining about it.
So, that will be my entire day Thursday. I have to put it together, and make it cohesive, and print out a lyric listing, so that the administrators can have a look at what is being said at all time. I really want to make it sound spectacular, and have the players appreciate it too. We'll see.
Also of note, yeah, I got to see the inside of the Stadium on Tuesday. It will look gorgeous. They're obviously not going to get it finished by this Saturday. But it'll be presentable. And hopefully, they'll be able to get it completely wrapped up by the 13th....when I won't be there. Leigh's wedding, and all.
OK, I'll have an update on the CD by Friday morning. I'm hopeful, but realistic. I will say, it starts with Journey's Don't Stop Believin, the "theme" for the team this year as issued by Coach, and then a record scratch, in to the very hard "Get Busy" by the Roots.